Random snippets of life with Daniel

A few weeks ago at dinner:

Doug: (insert random comment about Baltimore)

Daniel: No, Daddy. It's Vol-de-mort.


Here's a chunk of our conversation from Monday:

Daniel: I learned ALL about the pilgrims today.
Me: What'd you learn?
D: Well. There was this one Native American guy named Squanto. And he taught the pilgrims how to fish and plant corn. And if you plant a dead fish in the ground with your corn, it rots and the corn grows faster. And the corn likes it.
Me: Oh yeah?
D: Yeah. And I learned how they made water hoses.
Me: Water hoses?
D: Yeah. First, the pilgrims had to kill an animal. Like a turkey. And they used the turkey's skin to make the hose.
Me: (trying not to laugh at this point, but still very interested in this methodology) I don't think turkeys have very water resistant skin. Pretty sure it wasn't a turkey.
D: Goats. Then it was goats, because their legs are long and skinny and hollow... like a hose. So they had to kill the goat. And then they used the skin from its legs to glue together to make a hose. But they had to make the glue, because pilgrims didn't have stores. 
Me: Are you sure they didn't just carry the water from the river? Maybe with a bucket? 
D: Nope. They used animal skin.
Me: Got it. Did you learn anything else about the pilgrims?
D: Oh yes. I learned how they made bread. Let me show you. (proceeds to open a can of Pringles and a jar of peanut butter)
Me: Ok, bub. I'm with you so far, but I KNOW they didn't have Pringles or Jif.
D: So maybe I should just use a hot dog bun?
Me: .......???




And today at his class party, he asked his teacher, "Please may I have an extra plate for my little sister?"
I love this child. I need to do a better job of writing down the zany things he says, but that's a full-time job.