Expectations

This is part of an email I sent to a family member today to outline what I expect race day to look like. Notice how many times I use the word expect. I see 5 here, not to mention the times I used expect that's from the part of the email I'm not sharing.

My swim wave starts at 7:48 on 4/26. I expect to be in the water for 45-55 minutes. I do not expect anyone to be there that early. That's madness. :)

I'll be out on the bike for 3-3.5 hours (expecting to be back in transition around noon/12:30). Doug and the kids are hoping to catch me out on the road somewhere down towards Pirate's Beach. I'll get him to get in touch with y'all about that as the day approaches. Or even the day of. 

For the run... There's no telling. If all goes well, I'll be headed out no later than 12:45. My typical half marathon time is 2:20-2:40. I have NO idea what to expect that to look like after 57.2 miles of extreme exertion. 

My real goal is to finish before they close the course (which is 4:45). My stretch goal is to finish in 7 hours (which will be around 3ish). 

When I finish, I expect to be in the finisher area for a bit (30 minutes or so) for medals, photos, massage, etc. after that, I intend to eat at least 6 pounds of protein and collapse into a heap. :) I would love for y'all to join us for that celebratory meal.

I have oft compared Ironman to pregnancy, labor, and delivery. Increased levels of discomfort, increased appetite toward the end, counting down the days, obsessing over every item you put in your mouth, obsessing over every tiny detail. This summary of what I expect is kind of like a birth plan. I have it all figured out in my head, but race day will likely bring a million unexpected variables I haven't planned for. I am (just in this moment) considering racing blind. Ditching the watch. Pulling the computer from my bike. Refusing to ask, "What time is it?" I know that's madness, but I have to wonder if it'd be better for my psyche to let go of all the expectations and just enjoy the day. I am confident I can hit all the cutoffs. Keeping up with the time will only serve to frustrate me (or will it...?). 

That's my job over the next 18 days. Finish the training plan strong, let go of expectations, eat clean, stay away from wine, and hydrate like it's the most important thing I've ever done. 

****I can't wait to revisit this after the big day.****